Friday, May 11, 2012

Josh Beckett makes Red Sox Nation Vomit

Strike a pose you POS!
...and who couldn't be more happy than Yankee fans?

After coming off a season where Boston blew a playoff spot in the final day of the regular season, after we learned that the funky smell coming out of the Red Sox clubhouse was the remnants of fried chicken and beer, and in a week where longtime PA dude Carl Beane passed away, Josh Beckett decided to violently tug on the heartstrings of Massachusetts and beyond.

If you haven't heard, Beckett was pulled from his start last week, with manager Bobby Valentine explaining the move to be a result of "tightness in [Beckett's] lat muscle." The very next day, Beckett was caught with his hand in the cookie jar, as an observer saw him and teammate Clay Butthole shooting the ish on the golf course.

Beckett returned to the mound last night to face the Cleveland Indians in front of the Fenway faithful, registering a quite fantastic line:

2.1 innings pitched
7 hits
7 earned runs
2 strikeouts
2 walks
2 home runs allowed

That's 1 earned run per out. FAN-tastic. And it got worse, as Beckett displayed an utter disregard for the questions at his post-game press conference:

LET'S GO YANKEES (clap clap, clap clap clap)


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